Is the Global Pineapple Market the Next Big Bubble?

Is the Global Pineapple Market the Next Big Bubble?
Warren Warren
I am the Kwisatz Haderach of value investing

OMAHA, NE - How much do we really know about pineapples? I know that they’re all around us, they’re supposed to be “tropical” but no one can tell me when when pineapple season actually is, and they’re in almost everything, from Pina Coladas to pizza. All this worldwide interest in pineapples does not match the level of knowledge we have about the industry, and it may very well be that the global market cannot sustain itself for much longer.

Or maybe it can, who knows?

Do you even know more about pineapples than Bitcoin or mortgage-backed securities? No, you don’t. So why wouldn’t there be a large pineapple bubble on the horizon? What if half the world’s economy is fueled by fifteen farmers in – where ever the hell pineapples grow – over-speculating on the next what the pineapple gods will bestow upon them next season. Maybe all those Chinese manufacturers are using discarded pineapple fronds to make iPhones; you can’t say they aren’t. Maybe the Trump’s tariffs affect pineapples, you can’t say they don’t.

Where do pineapple trees grow now? Did you know that there aren’t even such a thing as pineapple trees: they grow on the ground like this:


Look at that thing! There’s only one pineapple on the bush or whatever. Only one, and most of the pineapple isn’t even edible, not the middle, not the sides, not the top, so where is all this extra pineapple going to come from? If we can’t even answer this for ourselves, then the best bet could be to just go short on Dole and whoever else they’ve got to be colluding with.

Sure maybe pineapples are a sustainable tentpole in our fruit-salad portfolios, but can we all afford to take such a risk?

All I’m saying is that wild speculation and fear mongering might be the best approach for now.

– Warren

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